This month has been so busy and next month is going to be even busier...one senior event after another. I just cannot believe how quickly the years have passed. It really seems like yesterday that I was taking Macy to her first day of kindergarten. I remember on the last day of school on her kindergarten year, I cried because I couldn't believe she was going to be in 1st grade and how her kindergarten year passed so fast and now she's going to COLLEGE!!! Where did the time go? How did it pass so quickly? Senior day at church is going to be May 10th. I have always cried in those thinking that one day Macy would be standing up there. The funny thing is that God has totally prepared me for Macy leaving. Everything changed when Macy turned 16. She had her own car and I was no longer picking her up and taking her places. She came and went as she pleased and I didn't see her near as much. Although I enjoyed not being a taxi anymore, there was a lot I missed, like getting to know Macy's friends so well (you get to know people pretty well when they're in the car with you all the time). :) Now Macy has friends that are really neat Christian people but I don't know them like I would have if I had been taking them in the car with me everywhere. Macy also is so involved in so many things that she's not home much. I think God does that for a reason for both the child and parent. It's a gradual detachment that needs to happen. My goodness, if Macy would have left for college when she was 15, I couldn't have handled it! But now, even though I'm sad about her leaving, I'm also happy for her. I know this is a new stage and it's time for her to move on. I'm sure I'll be emotional but not like I was when she was in 7th grade and I was imagining her up there on the stage as a senior. I'm much more prepared. I've got a sweet girl who loves the Lord and I'm excited to see what God has in store for her.
Speaking of my SENIOR, here we are at senior night at Denny Field....Macy's last home softball game probably of her life. She doesn't want to play in college and I don't blame her. She has loved softball for so many years. She started playing when she was 9 and has loved it ever since. The great news is that the Bruins are going to state!! YEA! :) That will be next Friday, which is the same weekend as prom, which Macy is probably not going to. I'm not sad about that and neither is she. She said she's been going to prom since 9th grade and doesn't mind missing the dance at all and will just go to the activities afterwards. I do have to say that while I'll miss taking pictures, I will not miss looking for a dress for her. That's always hard on both of us. :s
The fam came out to watch May May play. Hannah and Dawson came, too, but they had to leave early so they're not in the picture. Rosie Love was crying so the rest of us cried with her. :)
I LOVE this picture!!!! One thing that I love about Macy is that she really enjoys life and laughs A LOT!!! Molly is telling some funny story and Logan in laughing so hard that he's got his hands buried in his face. Logan, by the way, is an awesome guy who loves the Lord so much. Molly waited on God for the right guy and so did Logan (for the right girl). Both of them have never kissed a guy/girl or ever dated anyone seriously. They are both so serious about the Lord and have never felt right about having a relationship until this year. They have been best friends for a few years. Anyway, it's really sweet to see. I keep telling Macy to look at Zach (her cousin) and Molly (her cousin) and do what they do...WAIT on God...don't jump in front of Him. It is just so not worth it!!!!
What a BLESSING to see Michael W. Smith/Steven Curtis Chapman in concert. We were in the 2nd row at Robinson. It was so much fun because Shanny, Phil, Zach, and Hannah sat in the row behind us and directly behind me was my sweet friend, Kendra, and her daughter, Abby. It was a joy!!! Michael W. Smith was great and I've always liked him but Steven Curtis Chapman was just so inspiring to watch. He has been through great tragedy and yet he can still laugh and smile. There is a joy on his face that only comes from Jesus. It is such a testimony. I cried through the whole song Cinderella. Before he sang it, he talked about Maria and how he wrote that song for her and her sister when they were 3 years old and dressing up in different outfits at bedtime. He just wanted them to go to bed where he could go work. He realized after he put them to bed that he missed a moment and before long they would be grown like his daughter, Emily. So, he sat down and wrote that song in 1 hour. He never thought he'd sing it again after Maria's death but God told him to keep singing it and at the end he sings, "and we will dance again". Oh my gosh, I sobbed. I can't even imagine what that family has been through but there is still joy. WOW!!! Amazing!!! This concert blessed my socks off!!!
One more thing that has been on my heart. I was going to have uterine ablation last month but 2 days before I was going to have it done, I talked to my OBGYN and she told me that for best results, the ablation should be done between days 6-9 of your cycle. Well, that Thursday was going to be like day 17 or 18 so I decided to wait until this month. Well, I talked to God one more time about something I've talked to Him about before. I told Him that this was my last chance to have a baby and if it was in His will then to please give me a baby but if not I will be okay. Then, I didn't think about it again. Well, wouldn't you know it.....this month I didn't start my period until day 37. Okay, that has never happened to me before. My cycles usually start at day 23 but sometimes as early as day 17 and as late as day 26 but never later than that. I learned a few years ago to never get excited thinking I may be pregnant because I was a few days late and felt like I may be pregnant and when I wasn't, I cried for hours. I was so mad at God. I kept telling Lamar that I felt like God played a mean trick on me. Of course, I know better than to think God was playing a trick on me and asked Him to forgive my attitude and mistrust of Him. So, this time, I KNEW I wasn't pregnant. I knew it. I could feel it in my body (a mom usually can feel it when she's pregnant) and I kept wondering why God would have this happen to me when He knew it was my last chance and that I had specifically asked Him one more time. After thinking about it, I think that maybe He allowed this to happen because He wants me to trust Him with the unknown. You know, I don't know why that happened but I do know that I am not the least bit mad at God this time about it. His ways are not our ways and I trust Him. Anyway, no more babies for me and I'm okay with that. I have Rosie and being her aunt is so much fun and I get to do things that I couldn't as a mom, like spoil her rotten! :) I am blessed God put her in my life. She's my bright spot....my sweet sunshine and I love her to pieces. I am thankful that God gave Macy to me and I also have 2 sweet stepdaughters who are sweet as pie. Lamar was more disappointed than I was (because I never thought I was pregnant this time) but he trusts God, too. Oh, the reason I can't get pregnant is because Lamar had a vasectomy years ago. After we got married, he got it reversed...that was almost 10 years ago and I haven't gotten pregnant. Anyway, I'm good and I trust God and I know this may be too much information for some of you but that's okay...I felt the need to write about it. Now, I'm going to go enjoy this gorgeous day with the top down on the convertible!!! :)
Speaking of my SENIOR, here we are at senior night at Denny Field....Macy's last home softball game probably of her life. She doesn't want to play in college and I don't blame her. She has loved softball for so many years. She started playing when she was 9 and has loved it ever since. The great news is that the Bruins are going to state!! YEA! :) That will be next Friday, which is the same weekend as prom, which Macy is probably not going to. I'm not sad about that and neither is she. She said she's been going to prom since 9th grade and doesn't mind missing the dance at all and will just go to the activities afterwards. I do have to say that while I'll miss taking pictures, I will not miss looking for a dress for her. That's always hard on both of us. :s
The fam came out to watch May May play. Hannah and Dawson came, too, but they had to leave early so they're not in the picture. Rosie Love was crying so the rest of us cried with her. :)
I LOVE this picture!!!! One thing that I love about Macy is that she really enjoys life and laughs A LOT!!! Molly is telling some funny story and Logan in laughing so hard that he's got his hands buried in his face. Logan, by the way, is an awesome guy who loves the Lord so much. Molly waited on God for the right guy and so did Logan (for the right girl). Both of them have never kissed a guy/girl or ever dated anyone seriously. They are both so serious about the Lord and have never felt right about having a relationship until this year. They have been best friends for a few years. Anyway, it's really sweet to see. I keep telling Macy to look at Zach (her cousin) and Molly (her cousin) and do what they do...WAIT on God...don't jump in front of Him. It is just so not worth it!!!!
What a BLESSING to see Michael W. Smith/Steven Curtis Chapman in concert. We were in the 2nd row at Robinson. It was so much fun because Shanny, Phil, Zach, and Hannah sat in the row behind us and directly behind me was my sweet friend, Kendra, and her daughter, Abby. It was a joy!!! Michael W. Smith was great and I've always liked him but Steven Curtis Chapman was just so inspiring to watch. He has been through great tragedy and yet he can still laugh and smile. There is a joy on his face that only comes from Jesus. It is such a testimony. I cried through the whole song Cinderella. Before he sang it, he talked about Maria and how he wrote that song for her and her sister when they were 3 years old and dressing up in different outfits at bedtime. He just wanted them to go to bed where he could go work. He realized after he put them to bed that he missed a moment and before long they would be grown like his daughter, Emily. So, he sat down and wrote that song in 1 hour. He never thought he'd sing it again after Maria's death but God told him to keep singing it and at the end he sings, "and we will dance again". Oh my gosh, I sobbed. I can't even imagine what that family has been through but there is still joy. WOW!!! Amazing!!! This concert blessed my socks off!!!
One more thing that has been on my heart. I was going to have uterine ablation last month but 2 days before I was going to have it done, I talked to my OBGYN and she told me that for best results, the ablation should be done between days 6-9 of your cycle. Well, that Thursday was going to be like day 17 or 18 so I decided to wait until this month. Well, I talked to God one more time about something I've talked to Him about before. I told Him that this was my last chance to have a baby and if it was in His will then to please give me a baby but if not I will be okay. Then, I didn't think about it again. Well, wouldn't you know it.....this month I didn't start my period until day 37. Okay, that has never happened to me before. My cycles usually start at day 23 but sometimes as early as day 17 and as late as day 26 but never later than that. I learned a few years ago to never get excited thinking I may be pregnant because I was a few days late and felt like I may be pregnant and when I wasn't, I cried for hours. I was so mad at God. I kept telling Lamar that I felt like God played a mean trick on me. Of course, I know better than to think God was playing a trick on me and asked Him to forgive my attitude and mistrust of Him. So, this time, I KNEW I wasn't pregnant. I knew it. I could feel it in my body (a mom usually can feel it when she's pregnant) and I kept wondering why God would have this happen to me when He knew it was my last chance and that I had specifically asked Him one more time. After thinking about it, I think that maybe He allowed this to happen because He wants me to trust Him with the unknown. You know, I don't know why that happened but I do know that I am not the least bit mad at God this time about it. His ways are not our ways and I trust Him. Anyway, no more babies for me and I'm okay with that. I have Rosie and being her aunt is so much fun and I get to do things that I couldn't as a mom, like spoil her rotten! :) I am blessed God put her in my life. She's my bright spot....my sweet sunshine and I love her to pieces. I am thankful that God gave Macy to me and I also have 2 sweet stepdaughters who are sweet as pie. Lamar was more disappointed than I was (because I never thought I was pregnant this time) but he trusts God, too. Oh, the reason I can't get pregnant is because Lamar had a vasectomy years ago. After we got married, he got it reversed...that was almost 10 years ago and I haven't gotten pregnant. Anyway, I'm good and I trust God and I know this may be too much information for some of you but that's okay...I felt the need to write about it. Now, I'm going to go enjoy this gorgeous day with the top down on the convertible!!! :)
Comments
On the baby stuff, it is such a difficult thing to accept, but it is such a relief to rest in the fact that God's plans are so much bigger than us! Maybe HE knows how much Rosie needs/wants your attention and HE wanted you to be devoted to her!